Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
