Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
