Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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