I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
