In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I'm lost and stupid without you.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
