If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
