I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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