Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
