It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
a search helicopter?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize