Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
