jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
she peed on how many people?
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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