the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
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