I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize