so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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