Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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