Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
