So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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