I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
