Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Randomize
