Me too!
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
