I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
