Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize