Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Randomize
