I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
