He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
