Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize