Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
