When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
So much Jack, so little girl.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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