Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
