so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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