i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize