worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
