what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Randomize
