it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
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