Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
