Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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