She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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