i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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