thus making me awesome and them whores
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I just sucked dick on a ferry
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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