I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
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