is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
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