I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Randomize
