Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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