And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Omg I joined a choir last night...
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
