Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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