We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
