You can't special order awesome
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
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