He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
