ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
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