Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize