his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
