And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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