My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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